Card Feedback - Pay It Forward

Tired of posting a card, but not getting feedback?
Here, the idea is simple! You give feedback on the card that came before you, and then you post your card.

The Rules:
1. Give Feedback on the card before yours.
2. Post the card you want Feedback on.

It's suggested that you post only one card in each post, in order to keep things moving.

Here's the first card!



  • @Corwinnn
    What format is this card designed for? Mainly as it's on a very low power level.
  • edited May 2017
    As @modnation675 stated, this feels low on power for this cost and rarity. The name is generic and the art seems sub-par. I do like the matter-of-fact flavor text though and the fact that it feels Gruul-ish.

    I'd probably suggest {1}{g} and P/T - 1/2. Thanks for the thread and the example!

    Here's one I was fond of when I created it. It felt flavorful, and it filled the
    void of good Blue Black mill commanders in Tiny Leaders. What are your thoughts?

    See -
  • edited May 2017
    I'd say I felt it was perfect. The only thing I was wondering if you'd consider is the following. Mainly as there are a few bonus niche interactions in the long term, making it more usable with occasional future cards. But I wasn't sure how you felt about it balance-wise.

    "Whenever a player puts three or more cards from his or her library into his or her graveyard, you may destroy target creature with power 2 or less that player controls."

    Essentially meaning the cards didn't have to be from the top.


    A card I felt was very flavorful and wanted to hear opinions on. But it seems to not have gotten much attention. :(

    Edit: The card has been edited a bit since the artwork needed removing. (Activated ability cost!)

  • edited May 2017
    @modnation The deck thin seems pretty strong, maybe too strong. Would have to test to see if it is, especially with how low cost it is. The artificer in me likes how niche this card is though. It's just the right tool for in game sideboarding and deck thinning. I would test and see if it is too strong or just right.


    Posted this somewhere else with my other favorite card I've brewed up so far. It is built around flavor, but I think holding up counter spell mana till you eot this into abrupt decay or mid combat this into ambush viper when you don't even have green mana seems fun to me. Your thoughts?
  • Thanks for the feedback guys! That card was made for this challenge
    The challenge was to make a card with flavor text including:
    'They always try to run'
  • edited May 2017
    @brcien, I dislike the capitalization in the middle of the name of the card, but that's a personal thing and a minor nit-pick. Other than that, it seems strong for as a 3cmc uncommon. Much of the time, gifting mana is more potent than it looks. The card is not completely busted, in my opinion, but maybe a little too pushed?
    If all it had was flash/flying as a 2/2 uncommon, it would be fine as is. But other 2/2 flash/flying creatures tend to be 4cmc and/or have an ability that is less potent than adding two mana to your mana pool.
    Of the 3cmc cards like this, Quickling wants you to return a card to your hand; Dewdrop Spy only lets you look at the top card of your library; every other 2/2 flash/flyer is 4cmc.
    Burning-Tree Emissary is a 2/2 and does almost the same thing as your card but for 2cmc. However, Burning-Tree Emissary doesn't have flash and flying-- does adding both flash and flying for 1cmc seem reasonable on your card? That's up to you.
    You might consider making yours 4cmc, or perhaps having it add {b/g} instead of {b}{g}? Even just adding {b/g} would still be enough for a card like yours, I think.
  • @MrRansom - I LOVE THIS CARD!

    For a 0cmc cost card, it really packs a punch!
    The Artwork is phenomenal and very evocative. As far as style goes, the text bleeds out of the box ever so slightly, and could use a little touch up.
    The Message is spot on for this thread, and it's original version was actually an inspiration for this thread!

    Overall, nice work on a really fun and funny card. While it would never make it into an official MTG card set, it's perfect for MTGCardsmith!

    Here is my card
    It was made to showcase the Illuminati Set Symbol

  • So basically it says creatures with changeling! Lol. XD
  • edited May 2017
    @Corwinnn, thanks so much for the feedback! I will try to fix the text as you suggest. I appreciate the help, and I look forward to all the great designs that the discussion in this thread will likely spawn.
  • Hello @Corwinnn,

    I am not sure what Illuminati creatures there are to buff with Oathtaker, but I like the concept! Maybe give the Illuminati creatures hexproof too...?

  • edited May 2017
    First off, cool flavor hit with the Geist of Saint Traft parallel. Secondly, HOLY CANNOLI PIEROGI ON RAVIOLI TATERS, that's strong. Even if it gives your opponent a 4/4, they don't get to keep it, vs something like Hunted Horror, which costs only one mana less and still has one less toughness and trample, but the token downside is wild, with two 3/3 protection from black centaurs. In comparison, Geist of Heretic Traft is very overpowered, because the downside is largely nonexistent, and not lasting at all, and has a way around it. I'd say that the power and toughness could use toning down, just -1/-1, and it'd probably be closer to fine. Still an insane draft card.

    Opinions/thoughts/synonym for those words?

  • Don't feel like posting a card rn so someone else can also talk abut yours but the esper in me loves this. Strong story telling, artifact interaction in a way we don't have a commander for yet, a hugely build around in edh in general. Works way better there since it's a bit slow for every other format with how easily a kill spell could take the robot out and they steal your girl.
  • @brcien - Extra feedback is always welcome, so if you just want to give a card feedback, I'm sure no one will argue!
  • edited May 2017
    I love Alrendra Shatterbursts design. I just think it may be a little under powered. For six mana it seems to small to make a big impact. Perhaps make it five mana, that way it will become a more dangerous threat. But the flavor... wow!!!!!! You did such a great job! Overall, a fantastic design.

    I really just made this to test the new mechanic. You see, I'm trying to make a return to Innistrad and I didn't really know what to do mechanic wise. I hated the mechanics of the Eldrazi in Eldritch Moon so I had a go at my own form of Emerge. I would love feedback on the card as well as any ideas for mechanics or story line.
    Infernal Broodmaster
  • edited May 2017
    @Tigersol, your card says Transmorph 2. Therefore, I think you should specify in the reminder text what the number 2 signifies. Also, you don't need to say "To transmorph" in the reminder text. I think you should start the reminder text with "Sacrifice a creature..."
  • Okay, thanks. I'm not great at wording. : )
  • @tigersol I really like the Transmorph mechanic. I'd second MrRansom's notes on it, but other than that the card seems pretty cool with that mechanic.

    Here's mine:

    I made it awhile ago, so the wording may be a bit off, but I liked the mechanic so I've been working on a Brotherhood set ( if anyone wishes to view it
  • @syntheticregin I'm not sure you can say 'whenever this creature destroys a creature." I'm just not sure about the correct wording. You can't go the Sengir Vampire way, because this isn't just damage.

    I think a 4/5 with the destroy effect should cost at least 5 mana, especially at uncommon.

    As for Inherit, it is unique and interesting but unfortunately breakable. You can use it on your own creatures, so as a combo piece it's insane. Compare to Necrotic Ooze. Sure the ooze gets the abilities from all creatures in graveyards, but passive abilities are usually much better and more common than activated ones.

    Here's my card.
  • @Brainifyer Thanks for the feedback! I'm not great at balancing, especially when it comes to Rarity.

    I like the return effect you have, especially considering it takes effect on all creatures, not just your own. I'm curious if that would start becoming crazy though, since you can get all your creatures back once and all of your opponent's as well, but I have no clue.

    The Exert ability is awesome! I personally haven't seen it used this way in any of the Amonkhet set, where you actually get penalized for NOT exerting, so this is a really cool way of using that. I personally don't run super high cost creatures, but this seems really fun!

    Here's one that I actually really like, and I'm fairly sure it's pretty balanced, although I went back and forth on the mana cost a couple times:
  • edited May 2017

    I think for wording you can simply state, "Spells can only be cast whenever their controller can cast a sorcery." This would achieve the same thing. For 5 mana though you could probably give it another minor ability such as the ability since you are also being affected by it. Maybe one where activated abilities can only be done at sorcery speed too.


    I made this card hoping to enter for the Breaking Color pie contest but then I found out it was strictly life gain.
  • @syntheticregin Better wording would be "players can only cast spells at any time they could cast sorceries. Alternatively, the last should should read "all spells lose flash."

    I like the card, but it is WAYYYYYYY overcosted. Compare to Grand Abolisher (actual card.) image
    He costs 2, is a 2/2, shuts down activated abilities too and only hits your opponents stuff. Shattered time's only advantage is that it stops people from playing instant-speed on their turn, but still. It should cost 1 or 2 mana, especially at rare.

    Here's my next card.
  • edited May 2017
    First off, WONDERFUL pun. Secondly, if crab tribal ever took off, I'd love to run this card. If I run enough copies of a particular crab, it's a tutor, which could be good or bad, depends what the crab finishers would be. It's hard to judge balancing without an idea of what finishers could be. My advice would be to make it say the three crabs have different names, to avoid forced choice tutors, which could have game breaking repercussions.

  • edited May 2017
    I realize I did the wrong one.
    Oh well.....
    @Lujikul This seems balanced, but a bit strange for oone reason. It's name and flavour make it seem negative, and its a curse, but you're most likely putting it on yourself. Strange. I do like it though, it fits the flavor well.

    Impending crab is up there.
  • Lol, love the clip. I'll have to save that one.
  • @Brainifyer
    I'll critique @Mellenius to bring the force into balance.

    Visions of the Lost was designed to break the color pie, and break it you did in an arguably balanced way. I can't see a situation where you get more than one or two copies off storm. Since this doesn't straight up win games, you could probably have it cost {2} less without serious problems, even with delve.
  • @Lujikul
    Escalating Conspiracy appears to be fairly balanced in my opinion. Only critique I have about it is a small change of wording.

    "Then that player draws a card for each fear counter on Escalating Conspiracy"

    Hope that helps.
  • edited May 2017
    @Beydin I really like Hydra cards, they're just fun. Someone with more experience should probably comment on this too since I'm terrible at balance, but from what I see it seems mostly balanced.

    The ONLY problem I can really see is if you exploit the ability yourself using 1 damage ticks on it. The card would negate that damage, then create a 2/2 (with the buff) creature with deathtouch, and you can do that over and over for deathtouch chump blocks. Maybe make it so the "create" effect can only happen once per turn?

    Then again, not many people would form a strategy around that, so you should be good. I love the idea of the card and it seems well balanced, and I'm a huge fan of flavor text, so yours is awesome!

    I like making cards that have more neutral effects that change the game for everyone, not just one player, and so this was born:
  • edited May 2017
    @Beydin13, I don't think you've chosen a good name in It That Coils. "It That..." is an Eldrazi title in MTG-- like It That Betrays, and It That Rides As One.
    It's just an opinion, subjective and all, so this is hardly important but I thought I would share it.
  • @Beydin13 @MrRansom actually makes a good point. I forgot that the title is an Eldrazi one. Since cardsmith cards aren't exactly canon lol, it probably isn't a big deal, but worth noting. I actually made an "It That..." awhile back. This isn't necessarily for critique, but just a fun card
This discussion has been closed.