@Mir-151414 - The card feels very underwhelming for its CMC and rarity; it just doesn't do much to actually help you out on late game. I also think the name feels a bit awkward, especially when it's repeated in the rules text three times. I'd suggest something like this to put the card into right power level and change the wording into proper MTG language:
Ascended Mind
{u}
At the beginning of each end step, if you cast three or more instant and/or sorcery spells this turn, put a thought counter on ~ .
If you would draw a card, you may instead scry X, then draw X cards, where X is the number of thought counters on ~ .
Here's mine. Give a constructive comment on the card and/or favorite it before posting your card(s):
You have some wording issues, so I'll just put the correct wording that you can copy paste to a new version of the card if you want:
Flying, lifelink
Instant and sorcery spells cost {1} less to cast.
Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, Mir-Aenn, the Manipulator deals 1 damage to each opponent and you gain 1 life.
Keep in mind that your cost reduction ability works for all players and not just you. If you only wanted your spells to cost less, you'd need to use the wording from Goblin Electromancer: Instant and sorcery spells you cast cost 1 less to cast.
Yes @Faiths_Guide Very much so! Yeah, I meant it to say YOU CAST, and I missed a space somewhere. Always glad for the assistance that can be given on wording. That's my bane right there. Wording.
@KorandAngels One cannot request lengthier feedback in this thread.
@Mir-151414 It is recommended that more substantial feedback be left whenever possible.
Next Up: This was made for an order at My Restaurant . Feel free to swing by and place an order yourself! All of the past orders can be found on The Menu.
Comment on the Dominant Hydra and/or give him a favorite, then post up to two cards of your own!
@Faiths_Guide, Nice design, art, flavor, and mechanics. Also, maybe it's just because I'm a old fogey but I still can't get over how amazing the bullets and long dashes look!
@Temurzoa, All I can say is its artwork that pairs wonderfully with the card, and if that card was played with it would be very beneficial to the player using it. Very nice. Here's a remake of a card I did earlier. https://mtgcardsmith.com/view/mir-aenn-the-manipulator-3
@Mir-151414 Please don't post remakes of cards that have already been discussed here before.
You still have wording issues: Flying, lifelink (No caps on keywords beyond the first; needs a comma and no period.)
Instant and sorcery spells you cast cost {1} less to cast. (This is correct now.)
Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, Mir-Aenn, the Manipulator deals 2 damage to each opponent and you gain 2 life. (This shouldn't be broken into multiple sentences.)
@Temurzoa Thanks. Ya, you won't have to have been on the site long to remember not having access to long dashes and bullets. They look so good!
Next Up: PLACEHOLDER ART (To be replaced by personal artwork--still in progress).
Comment on the Counseling Trio and/or give them a favorite, then post up to two cards of your own!
@Mir-151414, I can't speak as to improvements, not having seen the previous card, but aside from some formatting issues this is a balanced legendary with some interesting applications. It's very simple, and too over-costed for its power level to be viable in commander, but it could have a spot in some jeskai decks. It also fits very nicely into the color pie and doesn't break any rules.
Here's a fixing of the minor formatting issues:
Flying, lifelink
Instant and sorcery spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.
Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, Mir-Aenn, the Manipulator deals 2 damage to each opponent and you gain 2 life.
------
Some other things: Mystic seems unnecessary and this feels very much like a wizard. Also, the flavor text is a bit awkward, though that's not really a big deal. Is Q'inar a thing in the lore of this card? If not, I'd recommend changing it to Human or something existent in MTG.
But those are all nitpicks. This is a very cool and balanced card that I could imagine coming out in a real set. Great job! In addition -- is that your art? If so, keep up putting your own art on cards.
Comment on my card and/or give it a favorite, then post up to two cards of your own! I specifically want feedback on the Legacy keyword.
@Faiths_Guide I hate when this happens, especially because it's more often during longer, more descriptive feedback (you posted while I was writing mine) -- but I'd love to give feedback on your card. Will comment immediately.
@TenebrisNemo, should be a rare for complexity. I think Lessen is a dangerous mechanic that should be used sparingly, and definitely not in the same set as one with Persist.
@Temurzoa very interesting use of Enchantment Creatures. Always nice to see previously unexplored territory being looked at. To be honest, I feel like Sun Shepardess's ability is kinda wonky, and maybe would work better as a bounce effect, like "remove target permanent with an ethereal counter on it from the game, then, return it to the battlefield under its owner's control.
Here's mine, with a few pieces of errata, since the card wording is a bit wonky.
Errata:
Creatures do not untap during the second main phase, or the third main phase
A creature attacking does not trigger the second combat phase, the casting of the spell does. It is entirely possible to cast this spell and not attack with any creatures during your turn.
@shadow123 Abandoned Marsh is extremely strong. Perhaps if the cycling cost was {B}{G} and the Dredge was 1 it would work, but these abilities together on a land scream danger. Bnew looks good overall but a little one-dimensional, I think tinkering with the trigger choices to not be so similar would greatly benefit him.
This is a card I'm workshopping for a challenge revolving around legendary Knights:
First draft. His abilities revolve around and curse he suffers under which makes him mighty but also brings sorrow (to be represented by a separate card) and his eventual freedom from it. Looking for feedback on everything, including name/artwork and exact wording. Thanks everyone!
@TenebrisNemo Your card was posted in between when I began my comment and when I posted it. Dreadful is an interesting form of evasion, it communicates the idea of great strength or terror equally well, what other plans do you have for it? I also always enjoy land interactions that establish a preferred locale for permanents. Solid pick. Please be nice and reciprocate.
@caulkwrangler I'm not certain why you wouldn't want him enchanted. From the lore, it seems like being enchanted hurts him, or would that be represented by his "curse card"
@flamelordytheking I like the flavor. Dichotomy is a division between two things ( I had to look this word up! :P ), so in this case the deck. Creative! I like the art selection. As far as the formatting, it looks a bit crammed together.
One thing you can do to it is don't add the text explaining the miracle cost. Since this is MTGCardsmith, people can just look up Official MTG abilities if they don't know them. This will leave space in your card if it looks too crammed.
Second, it looks like you were using the large text. Switch it to small text; I think everything will fit this way. This will make it look better.
@DomriKade pointed out all problems I see on the card's page, so I'll just post how I would fix that card. ----------- Starwalker {2}{w}{w}{u}{u} Legendary Enchantment Creature - Avatar, mythic
Hexproof
Starwalker can't be blocked.
Prevent all damage that would be dealt to Starwalker.
Constellation - Whenever Starwalker or another enchantment enters the battlefield under your control, put a +1/+1 counter on Starwalker.
[1/1] ----------- I know this is super slow, but considering how it's difficult to be removed, I think this balance is fair.
This is how you post card image <a href="Page URL"><img src="Picture URL" width="35%"></a>
Thanks Tomigon. I'll recreate it this way; definitely better. I wanted it be a slow card or else it would be a little too powerful.
Edit: I changed the "can't be blocked" to unblockable (DomriKade explained to me that it's not used that way anymore) to put both your names in the flavor text.
MTG Cardsmith Community Forums
Comments
Whoa! VERY nice!
https://mtgcardsmith.com/view/thinking-deep-thoughts
Ascended Mind
{u}
At the beginning of each end step, if you cast three or more instant and/or sorcery spells this turn, put a thought counter on ~ .
If you would draw a card, you may instead scry X, then draw X cards, where X is the number of thought counters on ~ .
Here's mine. Give a constructive comment on the card and/or favorite it before posting your card(s):
Next:
and/or
https://mtgcardsmith.com/view/mir-aenn-the-manipulator-1
This is my own artwork for a character I made up. ( Also who my username is based on. )
Hey, that's your own artwork? Neat!
You have some wording issues, so I'll just put the correct wording that you can copy paste to a new version of the card if you want:
Flying, lifelink
Instant and sorcery spells cost {1} less to cast.
Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, Mir-Aenn, the Manipulator deals 1 damage to each opponent and you gain 1 life.
Keep in mind that your cost reduction ability works for all players and not just you. If you only wanted your spells to cost less, you'd need to use the wording from Goblin Electromancer:
Instant and sorcery spells you cast cost 1 less to cast.
Hope this helps!
Yeah, I meant it to say YOU CAST, and I missed a space somewhere. Always glad for the assistance that can be given on wording. That's my bane right there. Wording.
One cannot request lengthier feedback in this thread.
@Mir-151414
It is recommended that more substantial feedback be left whenever possible.
Next Up:
This was made for an order at My Restaurant . Feel free to swing by and place an order yourself!
All of the past orders can be found on The Menu.
Comment on the Dominant Hydra and/or give him a favorite, then post up to two cards of your own!
Thoughts?
https://mtgcardsmith.com/view/broadening-horizons
Here's a remake of a card I did earlier.
https://mtgcardsmith.com/view/mir-aenn-the-manipulator-3
Please don't post remakes of cards that have already been discussed here before.
You still have wording issues:
Flying, lifelink
(No caps on keywords beyond the first; needs a comma and no period.)
Instant and sorcery spells you cast cost {1}
less to cast.
(This is correct now.)
Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell,
Mir-Aenn, the Manipulator deals 2 damage
to each opponent and you gain 2 life.
(This shouldn't be broken into multiple sentences.)
@Temurzoa
Thanks. Ya, you won't have to have been on the site long to remember not having access to long dashes and bullets. They look so good!
Next Up:
PLACEHOLDER ART (To be replaced by personal artwork--still in progress).
Comment on the Counseling Trio and/or give them a favorite, then post up to two cards of your own!
Here's a fixing of the minor formatting issues:
Flying, lifelink
Instant and sorcery spells you cast cost {1}
less to cast.
Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell,
Mir-Aenn, the Manipulator deals 2 damage
to each opponent and you gain 2 life.
------
Some other things: Mystic seems unnecessary and this feels very much like a wizard. Also, the flavor text is a bit awkward, though that's not really a big deal. Is Q'inar a thing in the lore of this card? If not, I'd recommend changing it to Human or something existent in MTG.
But those are all nitpicks. This is a very cool and balanced card that I could imagine coming out in a real set. Great job! In addition -- is that your art? If so, keep up putting your own art on cards.
Comment on my card and/or give it a favorite, then post up to two cards of your own!
I specifically want feedback on the Legacy keyword.
Oooh, you were right after me, but you left very nice feedback! Mine hopping over to the comment section on my card (https://mtgcardsmith.com/view/counseling-trio) and leaving some feedback?
Next Up:
Soul of the Church
Comment on @SteampunkDragon's card and/or give them a favorite, then post up to two cards of your own!
Here's mine. Give a constructive comment on the card and/or favorite it before posting your card(s):
I think the CMC is right.
Should it have {w} in the CMC ya think?
I made a new mechanic featuring the new Enchantment Creature borders! Thoughts?
https://mtgcardsmith.com/view/ravenous-nebulios
https://mtgcardsmith.com/view/otherworldly-wisps
https://mtgcardsmith.com/view/sun-shepherdess-3
Here's mine, with a few pieces of errata, since the card wording is a bit wonky.
Errata:
Creatures do not untap during the second main phase, or the third main phase
A creature attacking does not trigger the second combat phase, the casting of the spell does. It is entirely possible to cast this spell and not attack with any creatures during your turn.
My cards:
Here's mine. Give a constructive comment on the card and/or favorite it before posting your card(s):
This is a card I'm workshopping for a challenge revolving around legendary Knights:
First draft. His abilities revolve around and curse he suffers under which makes him mighty but also brings sorrow (to be represented by a separate card) and his eventual freedom from it. Looking for feedback on everything, including name/artwork and exact wording. Thanks everyone!
here's mine:
I like the flavor. Dichotomy is a division between two things ( I had to look this word up! :P ), so in this case the deck. Creative! I like the art selection. As far as the formatting, it looks a bit crammed together.
One thing you can do to it is don't add the text explaining the miracle cost. Since this is MTGCardsmith, people can just look up Official MTG abilities if they don't know them. This will leave space in your card if it looks too crammed.
Second, it looks like you were using the large text. Switch it to small text; I think everything will fit this way. This will make it look better.
But good card overall.
Random card:
https://mtgcardsmith.com/view/starwalker-1?list=user
(Idk how to make the cards big. Help?)
-----------
Starwalker {2}{w}{w}{u}{u}
Legendary Enchantment Creature - Avatar, mythic
Hexproof
Starwalker can't be blocked.
Prevent all damage that would be dealt to Starwalker.
Constellation - Whenever Starwalker or another enchantment enters the battlefield under your control, put a +1/+1 counter on Starwalker.
[1/1]
-----------
I know this is super slow, but considering how it's difficult to be removed, I think this balance is fair.
This is how you post card image
<a href="Page URL"><img src="Picture URL" width="35%"></a>My card: https://mtgcardsmith.com/view/zralb-the-capricious?list=user
Thanks Tomigon.
I'll recreate it this way; definitely better. I wanted it be a slow card or else it would be a little too powerful.
Edit: I changed the "can't be blocked" to unblockable (DomriKade explained to me that it's not used that way anymore) to put both your names in the flavor text.