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Common Challenge
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Comments
Why It's Snazzy: This is an interesting concept of a card that cycles on turn 2 for free. It's an interesting way to have a 56-card deck and would probably see competitive play.
Some Feedback: As with Mishra's/Urza's Bauble, this effect can be any color. So maybe this could be something like
Undipper (2)
Artifact
T, Sacrifice Undipper: Draw a card. Add two mana of any color.
The Rest:
Forebearance: too texty and difficult to comprehend
Scruple: essentially results in them missing a draw without shuffle effects, making this not all that great
Objurgation: also hard to comprehend on first read
Shaman Spell-Repeller: this is white, see Thalia, Guardian of Thraben
Caught in Sacred Flames: thanks for the tweak as it definitely improved the card, but it still wasn't better than Undip imho. Here, the flash feels unnecessary, and a common (or a card in general) should have as many words as it needs to and no more. But besides that it's a card that seems interesting to play with.
HM. @EternalWolf88: Asylum Inmate (yeah, believe it or not I can change my mind on things)
Why It's Snazzy: I think this card has some interesting decisions involved in it depending on whether you like your hand.
Some Feedback: We're getting to the point where I'm struggling to think of bad things to say, so that's a good thing. Random discard has some feel bad moments, I guess? You're in control though.
The Rest:
Search the Records: needs a lot of stuff in the set it's in to make it work and even then it's very Spikey. Like I mill myself for this many cards and make sure to leave a blue mana open in case I mill Search the Records or maybe I should leave a black open to cast this other insanity spell...you get the idea. I think this is a cool mechanic though that could be interesting if you can find a way to put less Spikey effects on it. Or if you make the effects appealing to someone who isn't playing the insanity deck. (If you don't know who Spike is, see this site: https://mtg.gamepedia.com/Player_type#Types)
Doomed Mafioso: too similar to Doomed Dissenter.
Newspaper: this is cool on the surface, but 2 mana to cycle isn't really that great and that is essentially what this is.
Monstrous Revelation: see my comments on insanity above.
Spirit of Animosity: could be phrased "whenever Spirit of Animosity attacks or blocks, sacrifice a creature." Seems underpowered. It's a cool concept however.
Zombunnies: subjective, could lead to many arguments about whether or not it's dark outside.
Gruesome Grimoir: you misspelled grimoire. Also this seems slow and not all that good.
HM. @TenebrisNemo: Tiger Stallion
Why It's Snazzy: This would play very well in games. It's a nice evasion ability, and green/red is the best spot to put it. So this is very cool mechanically and innovation-wise. I also like the flavor text.
Some Feedback: I actually have two issues with this, but neither affects gameplay. I think there would be a lot of tension around whether to put fliers in your deck in a set with lots of elude, so maybe it's not worthy of keyword status and should be used on only a few cards. Or maybe a flying-matters subtheme. My second issue is that I feel elude is not the most flavorful name for the mechanic here. I'd go for something like "burrowing" that suggests your creature is underground, far from the fliers' domain. But that's just me.
The Rest (and we have plenty of that here, so I'll try to keep it short):
Rooted Ferryman: not really common because of X and repeatable sacking
Knight of Retribution: color hosers should probably not be an entire mechanic since they're so variable
Danava of Miserable Fates: mulligan-matters has memory issues
Trained Parry: too texty to be common, and has a lot of flavor over function text
Battle Instincts: also a bit confusing
Enemy of Kingdoms: dreadful is also a bit hard to understand when you read it for the first, second, or third time
Lancing Boggart: see above
Old Surrakar: the mechanic feels too special to be common. Also, a 3 mana 3/3 with upside is a bit aggressive for black, especially at common. This is a great uncommon though at 2BB
Thoughtful Guest: repeatable sight feels uncommon, especially when you're tacking on transform. I do love the flavor here though.
I'll do the top five later, because this took more energy than I thought.
Again, thanks for playing!
Provoke the Beasts should work as an enrage enabler. That's why the ferocious ability gives your large 4/4 Dinosaurs with enrage +1/+1. So they don't even care about the 1 damage they take to trigger their rage.
The Provoke the Beasts thing makes sense, but it might make more sense to have it apply to everyone, similar to Shake the Foundations.
And I wasn't aware of Thalia, Guardian of Thraben's existance. I think I slipped there because I forgot death and taxes is mostly white. Will revamp spell-repeller after the contest, thank you
Also, fwiw, I don't actually impact your life at all, and if you disagree with me, that's perfectly fine. There aren't any prizes for this contest (outside of a few faves) so what I think of your card doesn't matter (and I think it's a cool card. A lot of times when people say something like "they were all great" it sounds cheesy but I actually had a really hard time organizing the cards as I was judging.)
Why It's Snazzy: This card is an interesting and aesthetically pleasing design. This is properly costed and seems fun to play with.
Some Feedback: This might be a bit difficult to understand on first look that it's actually +2/+2 for the given fight. But that's not a huge issue; there's math in MTG no matter what. I also don't know how to necessarily remedy that.
The Rest:
Ritual Blood Pet: Legacy seems complicated for common. Also black doesn't do Dark Ritual effects (fast mana, one time use) anymore, that's red.
Spiked Toad: Red, sure, but not green really...
4. @Faiths_Guide: Bramble Druid
Why It's Snazzy: This was the frontrunner early on in the competition. This is interesting to think about, quite simple to comprehend, balanced, and still flavorful. Bramble Druid feels like a slightly revamped Llanowar Elves and would provide copies 9-12 in Modern decks that want it. It's also a very clean design, so well done.
Some Feedback: It's a bit similar to Llanowar Elves, so it loses a few points for innovation, and it probably plays similarly as well. However, I still think it is interesting in its own right.
The Rest:
Shackled Colt: This doesn't feel aggressively costed enough to only give me two turns. Anyway, not as interesting as Bramble Druid
Bold Cutthroat: Looks balanced but unexciting. Maybe too similar to Captain Lannery Storm
Tireless Hoarder: Lots of words. Do you need all of them? If yes, it's an uncommon or rare.
Death Rattle Guard: Also too many words.
Tender Giant: Just make it start of precombat main.
Zealous Prosecutor: Also a bit hard to process upon first read.
Alley Recompense: Life gain doesn't make sense flavorwise and serves to make the card less clean overall imho.
Demoted Guard: Not black
Volatile Grunt: Re manashift, I don't think the color change is necessary. You can just, say "If you paid the manashift cost, do blank." Also, you aren't being judged by this, but I don't like playing with cards with situational ETBs a la Reclamation Sage. I never know when to cast them with no target. PS, I think I've played this collection on Untap. I think it has the set code BWCS.
Stainless Knight: Cool, don't see why you need a creature though, or why this is an artifact
Colonist Venture: Nice flavor, but it's inconsistent that you can sac any land and only fetch basics. Also, you can use additional cost tech.
Disruption Burst: This is a bit confusing and split second is not one of the simplest mechanics anyway-
Tavern Fraud: This is white, see Novice Knight. Except the haste of course, so maybe this should be multicolor.
Ranshi's Quandary: This card is very particular, so it doesn't feel common or fit the rage of red. However, it works well in a red deck with many burn spells, so I don't know where to put it. But not winning this competition...
Take Stock: The cache feels like a way to stack your draws and make games play out similarly, and that's once you understand it. Also, there's a contradiction here: the cache reminder text says you shuffle it in, but on the Cache token, it says you can rearrange the order any time. Which is it?
Deepmind Theft: See my comments on Take Stock
3. @Ilmarinen: Story Retold
Why It's Snazzy: Story Retold is one of those cards that makes you wonder if it was actually a real card, and then it surprises you when it isn't. The flavor text is nice, the rules text is clean, and the concept comes together nicely. This would also be fun in Standard, the deck with this and History of Benalia and Tragic Poet and Triumph of Gerrard and maybe some sort of white aggro shell.
Some Feedback: If I had to provide feedback, it might be fairer at 1W, especially since it nets you two cards ideally. Also, and this didn't occur to me for a while, it's weird to have a common that interacts with Sagas when there are no common Sagas, and I thought it should probably be a may ability. Then I realized it was a may ability. Nice job considering corner cases.
The Rest:
Unicorn of Forgotten Dreams: When I first saw this card, I was very impressed, and I felt this had an interesting bargain ability. It was definitely headed for the top of the list. Then I thought about it for a while, and I realized the bargain effect was a drawback: it's a 5-mana 4/3 that your opponent can sometimes prevent the damage of. So, you really need to be in control of it. But that means you can be netting two cards every turn cycle, which is better than Disinformation Campaign. (Already a great card in the Dimir surveil decks in draft.) Alternatively, you can cost it like it's a downside, maybe at 1 U/B U/B for a 4/3, if you don't want to change P/T, or at 3 U/B U/B for a 6/6 if you don't want to change mana cost. Just suggestions here. If you did the latter it might be cool to flavor it as a Demon. If you can figure out the bargain ability, I would be a superfan of this card. I already like the concept a lot. Anyway, let's move on.
Deflecting Buckler: This is a mouthful, and confused me when I first read it. (Notice a common theme throughout all the submissions?) I think it's a cool effect though if you can figure out a way to condense the text.
2. @Ranshi922: Boaring Creature Card
Why It's Snazzy: I found this card to be quite funny and a nice way to pack vanilla creatures in an un-set while still getting a laugh. The dialogue is very humorous and well-thought-out. I also like the flavor text...
Some Feedback: This is potentially a big issue, but it's easy to fix: many players might think that this creature actually has trample for real. So it's important to clarify that in the third paragraph.
The Rest:
Coiling Mortality: If your opponent has only creatures in hand they can't discard, so you need to make them reveal their hand. The reincarnate effect also isn't necessarily white, but I'm not sure.
Feline Abbots: I'd actually rewrite the card as follows-
Feline Abbots (4U)
Creature - Cat Monk
Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, Feline Abbots gets +1/+1 and gains flying until end of turn.
4/4
This deals with the issue that the prowess trigger (noncreatures) and the trigger for the second ability (instants/sorceries) are slightly different, yet similar enough that you feel like it should be the same.
Cave of Forgotten History: Texty for a common, and you can't play it on the earlier turns for full value.
Field Mouse: Nimble as a whole mechanic leads to lots of random decisions which makes players feel like the game is all up to luck. (It is, but moreso.)
Compelling Rebuttal: If the creature starts with power 4, but the Aura makes it have power 1, does the Aura fall off? I don't know, but many people would get it wrong either way.
Autonomophobia: Feels niche
Eldrazi Thrasher: The scale of the ability, five creatures, is too much for a common; at least I think so.
Now it's time for number one.
Why It's Snazzy: This card is everything I was looking for when I created this contest. It's a good power level (I think), it's flavorful, it's simple, it's common. It perfectly captures the flavor of the guild of Rakdos. The card can be interpreted as black stabbing itself in the back to stab its opponent or red being so reckless it just doesn't pay enough attention to care. I imagine this would be a fun card in an aggro deck, and the menace keeps it from being too fragile. In Limited, it might be a nice Rakdos filler card that is good when you're winning but when your opponent has many creatures or you're on defense, it is quick to die. Depending on the environment (it would be at home in Ravnica Allegiance) it might also fit in the Boros, Orzhov, or Gruul decks. I also enjoyed reading the flavor text.
The Rest:
Unseat: this is interesting in that the ability also saves the creature. If Hellhound didn't exist, this would have been top 5.
Cavalry Vanguard: this too, actually. The cards from this submission all seem to have simple abilities that work together in intricate ways. One thing, I feel like a chivalrous creature would tap itself to help others, not make others tap to help it, so that feels like a flavor fail.
Displacer Deputy: interesting, but as someone mentioned somewhere, it goes infinite with itself.
Appeal to the Crowd: the abilities do the same thing much of the time, and I think that is a negative-
@sorinjace: I think it depends whether you make it matter.
@Faiths_Guide: thanks for the support.
I’d be happy to discuss any of my commons with you in PM. It appears that you were confused by some of them (Demoted Guard etc.).
Thanks for the recognition! I tried to employ as much lenticular design in my commons as possible to create as you put it “simple abilities that work together in intricate ways”
And Demoted Guard didn't confuse me, it's just not black. It's definitely doable in green (Highland Game) and maybe white, but not black.
@sorinjace: Since I've already judged, I am not accepting further submissions; I apologize for any inconvenience.
@bnew07: I didn't know what that was until I Googled it but that's definitely what I was looking for. https://magic.wizards.com/en/articles/archive/making-magic/lenticular-design-2014-12-15
If any of you want to say anything else to me, feel free to do so privately.
Again, thank you to all participants, and remember to favorite any cards you like that were submitted!
This thread is ready to be closed.
When I said your comments were interesting, I was alluding to how interesting (and different) your thoughts were. You apparently had difficulty understanding a lot of things, or thinking they were too complicated even if they weren’t. A good example is how black loves to do life gain on death triggers, like I demonstrated on Demoted Guard, but you seem not to have grasped it.
Cache you’d be absolutely correct on within any existing set’s framework. However, like bestow in Theros, amass in War of the Spark, and many many other complex mechanics, if a set is designed around it it appears at all rarities. Cache would require such a set.
Anyway, don’t want to come across as mean, just wanted to fill you in a bit and offer help/discussion whenever you’d like! Feel free to PM me anytime.
I've done a Gatherer search for all the creatures which gain life upon their death. Here's what I got.
Colorless:
Anodet Lurker
Enatu Golem
Guardian Automaton
Onulet
White:
Auspicious Ancestor
Paladin of Atonement
Silent-Chant Zubera
Green:
Arctic Nishoba
Fyndhorn Druid
Highland Game
Lifeblood Hydra
Sultai Flayer
Tarpan
White/Green Hybrid:
Centaur Safeguard
White/Green Multicolor:
Mycoid Shepherd
Green/Black Multicolor:
Attendant of Vraska
This suggests that the current policy is that colorless, mono-white, and mono-green can gain life upon their death, but not mono-black.
And imho, you have to remember that in a real set (which is how I judged the Common Challenge) players of all different experience levels must understand the cards, and it's important to simplify the reminder text. Since you've probably considered cache more than most people, it may seem simpler than it actually is. So when I say something is too confusing, I don't mean necessarily that I don't understand. I mean that many Magic players might not understand.
Again, I don't want to seem mean or offend anyone. This isn't consequential at all and I don't want to get fired up, but I wanted to defend my comments, because I felt saying that I was "thinking they were too complicated even if they weren’t" is a bit unfair.