Corwinnn's Downfall

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  • edited April 2017
    Squirrels shall rule all!!!!
  • Some fan (non) fiction:

    It was the day of the confrontation between both armies. The sky was overcast above the windswept hillside, and the air smelled of ozone. Although there was no rain, thunder rumbled ominously from the heavens. The grass on the hillock was gray and dying, rippling silently from the strong gale. No sound pervaded the desolate landscape...but not for long.

    Marching could soon be heard behind the tallest of the rolling hills, the sound of trudging paws and murmuring wheezes. First came their commander, @KrampisZman, a tired but proud beaver clad in iron armor. He carried with his wooden sword a weathered standard depicting a silly Pokemon. Next came his advisor, known to the Bidoof as @BradXmagic. Once, he had been a warrior of @Corwinnn, but shockingly betrayed him/her to join his new dark lord. Finally came the army, a hundred exhausted beavers with comical faces. Some carried weapons, nothing more than wooden cudgels. None had armor. But all were wearied and weak, for cartoon beavers are not used to marching.

    The army waited at the top of the hillock, watching nervously for any sign of their adversary. @KrampisZman's smirking face began to falter. @BradXmagic scratched his beaver armpits uncertainly. Some of the Bidoof soldiers began to lay down, worn down by their travels. But a sharp bark from their commander sluggishly forced them up, and they stood there leaning on their comrades. The Bidoof waited on top of the stormy hillside, reluctantly ready for everything.

    But nobody came. No royal emissary announcing unconditional surrender. No @Corwinnn stumbling up the hill and begging for forgiveness. Not even a squirrel. At least not yet.

    @KrampisZman began to smile. He thought the cowardly @Corwinnn fled before his army, and that he won the battle. The Bidoof commander turned to address his comrades.

    A sudden gust of icy wind swept through the valley, knocking over several Bidoof soldiers. The sky darkened, shifting from a blank gray slate to a churning black maelstrom. @KrampisZman's ears popped, and he moaned in pain. Then he heard @BradXmagic's yell of astonishment.

    He was pointing to the bottom of the hillock, a flat valley covered with rippling grass. But the grass was shifting, moving with the wind, and it formed a horrifyingly familiar symbol:

    The Squirreltopia set symbol, dread sigil of the MTGCardsmith admin @Corwinnn.

    @KrampisZman's spine prickled, and his hair stood up on end. He yelled at his shivering army to retreat, trying to make his voice heard, but nobody heard him through the howling winds. Then other Bidoof's saw the Squirreltopia set symbol. @KrampisZman understood his army's panic.

    And then an event happened, so spectacular and monumental, that only Gelectrode's award-winning book Top Ten Battles and Why Izzet Mages are Awesome could fully describe what happened. Below is an excerpt:

    "And the clouds did part, and the lightning did zag, and from the blessed heavens, the Lord @Corwinnn did speaketh: 'Bringeth thine a moste righteous and painful death to thee Bidoofs, and let thine Squirrels reign until the day the Sun explodeth, the Moon crasheth into thine Earth, and the Americans finally agree on election results.' And lo and behold, He/She made it so."

    The ground writhed and warped. Cracks opened in the ground, and hundreds upon thousands of squirrels poured forth from the deep bowels of the Earth. The screams and the howls and the yelps of the Bidoofs were covered by the chittering skittering death surrounding them. @KrampisZman tried valiantly to stave off the Bidoof apocalypse, but was overrun by the legions of squirrels and was messily devoured. @BradXmagic begged to @MTGCardsmith and @Corwinnn for mercy, and was still praying when the squirrels ripped him apart. The puny ragtag gang of Bidoofs, in spite of their leaders' defeats, solemnly readied their weapons and prepared for the final confrontation. Nothing marked their passing other than muffled screams and a bloody red haze.

    Nothing remained of the epic Bidoof Massacre. The squirrel army, before leaving to conquer the rest of the world, consumed the bones and licked the hillside clean of blood. Above, the clouds dissipated into blue sky and the sun shone down upon the placid heath. It was a beautiful day for a truly beautiful happening: the quelling of the folly Bidoof Revolution

    Oh yeah, I made a card too, I guess.


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  • The hard hat is a nice touch, but the Bidoof on a Pike is Masterful!
  • @BradXMagic
    Counter target CounterSquirrel spell
    MUAH-HUAH-HUAH¡¡¡
  • @Gelectrode
    That masterful piece of literature just made my day!
  • edited April 2017
    Deleted.
  • edited April 2017
    Noooooooooooo! @KrampisZman I, @Blazin_Biscuit, will restore your dream and bring the squirrels to their knees!

    Everyone, CLICK ON THE CARD!
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    Link for card page here

    I'm coming for you now @Corwinnn

  • @Corwinnn you may have thought you had won, but no... the Bidoof army was only a test.

    THE REAL BATTLE IS STILL TO COME!
  • @Blazin_Biscuit, Do I need to write another essay of literature to again confirm @Corwinnn's oligarchical dominance of MTGCardsmith?
  • @Gelectrode I don't care for your fancy words and your... "fan fiction"s. Do as you please, but you shall not stop this up rising!
  • edited April 2017
    "I shall not let you down, o my Lord!"

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    And this one.

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    And this other one.

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  • @Corwinnn @Gelectrode @KrampisZman @BradXmagic @mtgcardsmith
    I'm going to start a Just for Fun contest for this. I know I'm fighting a losing war with the shear amount of @Corwinnn fan here, but I think it will be interesting.
  • I believe that a planar cleansing needs to occur. I may not like squirrels but I dislike Bidoofs astronomically more. So I'm taking away mana privileges.

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    I believe since every color of mana was used.... that is including all of the basic land types.
  • @Corwinnn @Gelectrode @KrampisZman @BradXmagic

    Right I've made the new contest, you can find it on the Just for Fun Contest category, or here

    I don't want to steal your contest @KrampisZman, but if I have you approval, I'll keep it up.
  • @Blazin_Biscuit, It's not fan-fiction when it is fan-nonfiction!
  • @Gelectrode It is in fact fan-fiction because everyone knows the Bidoof would win :)
  • Curse you Bidoofs and your diabolic scheming!!
  • Cool cards by the way.
  • @Tigersol all made using the power of Microsoft PowerPoint 2010
  • edited May 2017
    STOP FIGHTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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    DO YOU REALIZE WHAT YOU ARE DOING? NOTHING BUT DEATH AND DESTRUCTION! FAMILIES ARE TORN FROM THEIR LOVED ONES GOING INTO WAR! THEY MOURN THE LOSS WITH TEARS AND ALL THEY GET IS MORE DEATH!
  • edited May 2017
    More blood for the squirrel god.

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  • @Hergusbergus Why would we want to stop the glorious Bidoof Revolution! Viva La Bidoof!
This discussion has been closed.